Headaches don't do you justice, Jack Spicer
by Vamp829
Summary: After a rock slide, Jack Spicer loses his memories. The Monks  and the Big Bads of Heylin  try to help him get his memories back. Lucky for Jack, that's not all that he gets. He also gets a relationship he would have never dreamed of.
1. Jack's Not Alright

First, a Disclaimer. _**Xiaolin Showdown **_is owned by Christy Hui and Warner Bros entertainment. I own nothing as of this moment, though don't hold me to that later.

**Vamp:**Hello all. First, allow me to say, for those of you who are reading my other story, yes, I know, I lied. I said I would be making a Batman one, but I'm a bit stuck on that, and I'm putting it on the back burner. Also, I will be updating soon, however I'm arguing between two ideas and I'm not sure which one I like more.

Secondly, I know Jack is_ **very **_OC right now, but he's intended to be. If you don't like that, fine, don't care. Also, in later chapters I tend to put Yaoi. If you don't know what that is, I suggest you Google it. It will be a pairing with Jack Spicer. If you have a preference, suggest it to me. Hell, I might even forgo the Yaoi with Jack for someone else if people like it enough. However, I will be adding Mature things, hence the rating. Also because of swearing. I like it.

Please rate, review, let me know what you think, and enjoy. This chapter was not beta-read, so if anyone finds any mistakes I might have missed, please let me know. I'm very OCD about that stuff. _**

* * *

**_

**Chapter 1: **Jack ain't alright.

"_JACK SPICER! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?"_

Red, unfocused eyes glanced around slowly as the owner of them sat up, staring at the speaker who had ran in front of him. He tilted his head to the side and let out a chuckle, closing his ruby eyes.

"No," he drawled out in a goofy voice. "Can't say I am, large, yellow, talking ball. Can you explain to me how your talking? Cause I think physics would denote that doesn't work. But then again, everything here's blue, so maybe I'm in a new world all together!" the albino said, falling backwards onto the ground once more with a small giggle. He heard tense noises as people began moving closer to him as he sat in the mouth of a dark cave that was partially filled with rocks.

"Uh….Jack? You feeling alright?" The albino almost rolled his eyes at this. He had already been asked that. He sat up and suddenly laughed when he stared at a goofy looking figure before him. The man had bronze skin and was all wavy. "Hey look, a Sufugly man!" he giggled.

He heard the yellow ball speak again. "What is a 'Sufugly'? I have not heard of such a word."

The albino sat up and pointed at the bronze man with an evil smirk. "A Super Fuckin' Ugly Man!" he laughed before falling back, closing his eyes. He heard the sounds of growling and scuffling, but he was too dazed to care.

"Spicer? What do you see when you look at Om- the yellow ball." the albino froze at this voice. Something about it, how cool it was, made both his skin crawl and his body tremble.

He sat up and stared at the ball. "A yellow ball. With 9 holes. **OH! **Are you a bowling ball?" he giggled, patting the yellow thing. It growled. "What's wrong lil' Bowling Ball?"

"My name is Omi!"

The albino nodded again, his red eyes closed for a moment. "I apologies, BowlOmi. Can ya help me up?" he asked, putting his hand on Omi's head to lift himself up. He began falling over instantly. "Whoops, grounds moving."

He was caught by a….Cowboy? He stared at the figure before cackling. "HA! Look, it's Buffalo Bill come back to get me for all my jokes. Or are you a Brokeback Mountain Cowboy?" he asked lewdly, wiggling his red eyebrows, getting a growl of hatred. He giggled again, making to move. He stumbled a few steps before gaining stride and walking. He stopped when Omi called out to him.

"Jack Spicer! You cannot go on your own!"

The albino, Jack Spicer, laughed and turned around, pointing a finger at himself. "Jack Spicer? That's a gay name." He didn't notice the frowns or looks of worry passed through the group staring at him. "Is that really my name?"

A short girl with black hair in pig tails walked forward. "You…you don't remember?"

Jack shook his head, running a hand through his shock red hair, only to pull it back in surprise. Blood coated his fingers. "Whoa. What happened to me?" He glanced at the people and put his hand down to his chest. His bloodied fingers, accidentally brushed against a small button on his Helibot's straps and the propellers opened. He looked up, 'oooh-ing' at the sight when a anatomic voice sounded from the pack. "Autopilot engaged. Destination: Home."

Jack was shot into the air, laughing in surprise. He heard people calling out his name as he was shot in the air towards his home. All that was on his slightly aching mind was: Who were they, who am I, why am I bleeding, and when do I get home.

On the ground, the Xiaolin monks, Wuya, and Chase Young watched the injured teen fly home. The monks looked after the small figure with looks of worry. Wuya tapped her teeth with a sharp nail, while Chase Young stayed silent, his piercing golden eyes never straying form the boy who was still giggling, his sharp ears just barely able to still hear the noise.

Finally Clay spoke. "Ya recon Jack'll be alright? That rock slide hit 'im pretty hard. He didn't even recognize us or remember his own name." There was a silent moment of thought that passed through them. Jack Spicer, who was so egotistical and narcissistic, had disliked his own name?

Raimundo, still sore from his insult mumbled something under his breath before his own look of worry appeared. "I….I don't know. He didn't seem alright. " He shook his head. "We'll check on him tomorrow.

He turned to look at Wuya and Chase Young to find they were already gone. He frowned, turning his head to the rockslide. All this for a Wu.

* * *

**Vamp: **Poor Jack! He got beaten by a rockslide! And he doesn't even remember his very gay name. And it is, isn't it? I know I'm obsessing about it, but it's Spicer. _**Spicer**_. That's a smidge flaming in my mind. Anywho, in the next chapter, we will be hanging out with Jack as he tries to find himself and get used to the Robots in his house and where the hell his room is.

Now if you excuse me, Jack and I were actually in the middle of looking up Yaoi pictures and pictures of Robert Downey Jr., who is absolute smex.


	2. Jack stumbles Home

First, a Disclaimer. _**Xiaolin Showdown **_is owned by Christy Hui and Warner Bros entertainment. I own nothing as of this moment, though don't hold me to that later.

**Vamp: **Howdy! I'm back y'all, and I have a new instalment of Jack Spicer for all you. Thanks for the two people who reviewed and the countless who subscribed and added this to their list of stories to watch for. It means a lot. Extra thanks to Avalon's mists, who gave me some neat information about the name Jack Spicer.

Again, I know Jack is ver OOC right now, but so would you be if you couldn't remember anything about yourself. Humor it.

Please rate, review, let me know what you think, and enjoy. This chapter was not beta-read, like most if not all of my writing, so if anyone finds any mistakes I might have missed, please let me know. I'm very OCD about that stuff.

* * *

**Chapter 2: **Jack stumbles Home.

It took Jack Spicer three hours for his jetpack to get him home. He didn't mind, however, as he smiled weakly and giddily at the ground below. He didn't know what was going on or how he was flying, his head pounding too hard for any new information to enter it, but he was enjoying himself greatly.

He landed with a stumble and an 'Off', his jet pack shutting down as he was a few inches above the ground, making him fall and roll for a moment. He looked around weakly, his red eyes wide and glassy. He stood, loosing his balance for a moment, before looking up and gasping. "Whoa."

He stared up and the enormous mansion, feeling minuscule in comparison. "Who lives in this swanky joint?" he muttered in amazement, weakly walking up the driveway he had landed on towards the door. He needed to lie down for a bit and get over his killer headache. He rung the doorbell, leaning his head against the cool wood door with a sigh.

He blinked, looking at the doorbell. He pressed it again…and again….and again. He growled. "What the fuck? Isn't anyone going to answer?" he began pressing it repeatedly, growling more and more until finally kicking the door, which he instantly regretted, holding his injured foot. "OWIE!"

It was at that moment the door opened. Jack blinked at the sight, falling back onto his ass, though he didn't notice. He stared, stupefied, at the thing floating in the doorway.

It was bronze, gold, and onyx colored. An animatron, a robot. It's red, soulless eyes stared down at Jack, and his heart beat faster in fear. He opened his mouth to scream as it spoke.

**"Welcome home Master."**

Jack blinked, watching as it floated over, picking him up and dusting him off. Master? Who was Master? Not him. He shook his head. "I-I'm not your-"

The Jackbot simply pushed him inside, shutting the door. Jack balked, walking backwards. Would it hurt him to lie and say he was it's master? After all, he couldn't' remember who he was or where he was or anything. And he just needed to rest for a while.

"I-I need a p-place to rest." he said weakly. The Jackbot hung there for a moment before floating ahead.

**"Of Course Master Jack. I shall take you to your bedroom."**

Jack blinked. There was that name again. Jack. That's what those people -though he was sure they were hallucinations- had called him. And, despite his headache, he was thinking a bit clearer. Jack Spicer they had called him. It was still a gay name. Something about it tickled the back of his mind. It was on the end of his tongue.

He followed the robot, his arms rapped around himself. He took the time to look himself over. He was wearing huge boots that didn't fit him and clunked as he walked. His trench coat was tattered at the edges from poor treatment. The shirt underneath, a red tank top with Frankenstein, just simply embarrassed him. His gloves were black and fingerless and smelled faintly of oil and smoke. His pants were a bit baggy and the belt that held them to him was a worn piece of brown leather.

He didn't seem to take good care of himself.

He wasn't paying attention and walked straight into the Jackbot, groaning and falling back. He blinked, looking ahead and gasping again.

He had been taken to a large bedroom, painted black and red. The floor was a deep mahogany, that was cared for and spotless. The bed at the other end of the room was a large four poster with blood red sheets and black pillows. There was a black canopy hanging down from it. There was a large bay window covered with black curtains, the window seat just barely showing from underneath it. Jack covered his mouth in surprise.

**"Your old bedroom has been aired our for you Master Jack. Your new bedroom in the basement is almost complete." **The Jackbot said, though he went unnoticed as Jack walked over to the bed, sitting down carefully on it as he began removing his boots and coat.

"I-I'm going to need some bandages for my head. I-I hurt it." The Jackbot nodded, turning and leaving the room, shutting the door behind it. Jack looked about, closing his eyes as he ran his had through his hair again, stopping before he his the injury again. He blinked, frowning as he reached up and pulled off a pair of… "Goggles?"

The were the best kept thing he had on him as far as he could tell, polished glass and a perfect strap. He set them on the end table next to him, taking off his belt and pants. He looked down, staring at the heart boxers he wore and shook his head. "I'm a dork."

He crawled under the covers, cooing at the silk. He laid his head down, closing his eyes feeling content. They snapped open, however, long enough to shout.

_"Please God tell me I'm not Jack Spicer the Poet!"_

_

* * *

_

**Vamp:** Not as deep as I would have liked, but I was having a hard time writing this one. I plan to have Jack be a bit more interesting in the next chapter...or I might go to the POV of someone from either the Heylin or Xiaolin Side, I don't know. I'm fickle.

Poor Jack's a little freaked out, huh? But at leat he hasn't screamed like a girl yet. Which he does. A lot. And still he's my favorite character. What can you do?

Now, if you'll excuse me, Jack's hanging over my shoulder and is ordering me to write more for my other story, **To Ratigan, The World's Greatest Rat**, and he's threatening to call Ratigan and Basil back here.

And Basil has a gun.

And has threatened to use it. And Ratigan and Jack won't help. They don't like me enough to.


	3. Jack Settles In and The Monks Brood

First, a Disclaimer. _**Xiaolin Showdown **_is owned by Christy Hui and Warner Bros entertainment. I own nothing as of this moment, though don't hold me to that later.

**Vamp: **Once more I return. I know, it's a shocker. I want to start off by apologizing for not posting for a year, both in this story and in **To Ratigan, The World's Greatest Rat**, which I will be attempting to post in in the next few weeks. I have no decent excuse as to why I have put off posting in so long, so I won't bore you, but I and everyone who enjoys reading this story should thank **Tsuki Yosuke**, **GothicGoddess-13**, and all the others who reviewed who gave me the kick in the butt to continue.

Once again, I know Jack is absolutely OOC, but if you were knocked in the head by 30 tons of rock, so would you...or you'd be dead, either or.

Please rate, review, let me know what you think, and enjoy. This chapter was not beta-read, so if anyone finds any mistakes I might have missed, please let me know. I'm very OCD about that stuff. __

* * *

**Chapter 3: **Jack Settles In and The Monks Brood.

With morning brought no answers for Jack, who had laid in the large bed that very nearly swallowed him whole. He wasn't sure, but he doubted that he had ever felt this comfortable before. He curled his fingers in the silky sheets, smiling weakly, too tired for anything better. He forced himself to sit up with a groan, sliding out of bed straight to the floor. "Ow." he muttered, holding his head.

He blinked in surprise, patting the spot above his temple to feel the cotton of the bandage again. "Who-?" he began before the door open, making him jump up and grab the sheet, covering his mostly naked body as a blush formed. He needn't have bothered, of course.

Jack didn't feel like he should have been as surprised as he was. The first robot should have given him a clue, but even so, his mouth fell open in shock. It still had the onyx finish of the first one, but this had obviously been an attempt to manufacture a human. It was the chest and up of a blond haired, overly smiley man wearing evening wear. Jack blinked and felt his arms lower a bit, feeling less embarrassed.

_Gotta give it to whoever lives here, this is the life. Wonder where he buys the robots, though._

**"Good Morning, your wonderfulness that is Master Jack."** the robot crooned, flying over to him. Jack frowned slightly, a red eyebrow raising.

_Well that was…a bit much for a wakeup call, wasn't it? _Jack thought, using the bed to lift himself up. _This Master of there's must be a total ham…or a freak if he needs that much primping. _

"Um…yeah, look, I really need to get cleaned up and maybe some new clothes. C-can you show me to the bathroom?" he asked, rubbing the back of his neck. He frowned as his fingers ran over dried blood. What had he done to himself? He tried to remember, but even that was a blur.

Jack's eyes widened as he sat back down. Actually, the more he thought about it, he really couldn't remember anything at all. He…he sort of remembered knocking on the door and seeing the robots but…how had he gotten here? He dropped his head into his hands and then yelped in pain.

**"Of course, Master Jack. Anything for you, Master Jack"** the robot primped, taking his arm and leading him down the hall. Jack frowned at the smiling thing. This one was getting on his nerves. He liked the one that had answered the door better.

As the floating butler opened the door, Jack felt his mouth drop open again. It was like a personal spa. Black marble and gold inlay everywhere with a large 12-man Jacuzzi tub. Jack felt himself getting weak-kneed and quickly grappled onto the bot. "Holy Moly, Mother of God." he muttered.

**"Will you need anything else, oh great Master Jack?"**

Jack's eye twitched as he lifted himself up and glared as hatefully as he could muster. He felt the need to intimidate the creation, though for the life of him he wasn't sure why. He could see this was a lost cause and sighed.

"No, this is great. Thanks…um…I-I'm sorry, what's you're name?" he asked, feeling embarrassed. He felt a headache build painfully behind his eyes and rubbed at it carefully. God, it had to be because of this robot. It felt like such a Yes Ma- He blinked. Yes-Bot. He just knew it. It was called Yes-Bot and the stupid _parts h__**ad cost so much I had to get a fucking loan from Panda Bubba, that loan shark bastard, and then he screwed me over! One of these days I'm gonna take my soldering iron and just**_

Jack blinked in surprise. Where had that come from? That…it had felt like him but…that wasn't the kind of thing's he thought up, was it? And who was Panda Bubba? He opened his mouth to ask but noticed for the first time that the Yes-Bot was gone. At least it had drawn him a bath, though. "Wonder how long I was daydreaming?" he muttered, heading over to the soapy water.

In the hall of Justi- Whoops, wrong story, sorry.

At the Xiaolin Temple, four monks were doing what they normally did after a search of Shen Gong Wu: Hiding from Master Fung to get out of chores. Of course, today, said monks had a great deal more on their minds as they hunkered down in their secret hideaway at the bottom of the Shen Gong Wu vault.

Raimundo, the Dragon of Wind, was flipping through a joke book lazily, every now and then looking at the other member's of his team. Since yesterday, he had found himself drifting back to thoughts of Jack, which was not something that usually was on the hot blooded latin's mind.

Usually it was how to get a picture of Kimiko undressing, but that wasn't the point.

Besides the fact that his pride had been severely damaged by that comment about being Ugly…well, Jack had said it more colorfully, but he chose to ignore it. But it was also how out of sorts Jack had seemed. He hadn't even remembered his own name. His name! Something he tended to scream out at people when he arrived! And he had even said it was stupid…well, no, again Jack had been more colorful, but Raimundo didn't really care.

At the other end of the small room, the Dragon of Earth was patiently wildling out a new wooden statue of a steer. It was hard to tell on Clay's, as per usual, blank face, but he was as troubled as his friend. For one, that Brokeback Mountain quip had almost made him throttle the albino. His hand moved too quickly and he cut off one of the horns. "Dang it." he muttered under his breath.

Kimiko, as usual, was playing with her palmpilot. She was wearing a pink Mohawk and a blue Lolita outfit, her Mary Jane slippers tapping as she flipped through websites. She was secretly looking up head wounds on MayoClinic. Jack had seemed so…so off. He didn't even seem to recognize who anyone was. She tapped her stylus against her painted lips thoughtfully, going back to her search.

It was Omi, though, who was meditating in the corner, that was the most upset. He hadn't spoken since they had come home, simply meditating. There were three things he knew for sure:

Jack Spicer had gotten hurt.

Jack Spicer hadn't remembered anyone.

Jack Spicer had gotten hurt saving Omi.

It had been an accident. The avalanche hadn't been expected, but Jack and Omi had been still standing there, both holding onto the Wu and…then Jack and pushed him out of the way and disappeared under the rocks.

Omi's eyes opened, tears welling in them. Jack Spicer could have died and he hadn't even thought about himself. That was proof there was some good in the goth boy. He wiped his eyes quickly so no one would notice. Jack had to be his friend. Only friends were so selfless. He had to go see the other and make sure he was okay.

Omi glanced at his friends quickly. Yeas…yes. It was his duty as a Xaiolin Warrior to help the hurt. And if he managed to talk Jack into changing to the Xiaolin Side…well, all the better. Omi nodded, pleased with himself, and continued his meditation, a weight lifted off his shoulders.

Jack scratched at his ears for the fourth time as he lounged in the tub, careful to keep his head from going under. They were burning like hell. "Who keeps thinking about me?" he muttered, then shrugged, blowing some bubbles off of his hand.

_Cinnamon bubble bath. How wonderful._

* * *

**Vamp: **Poor old Jack, all freaked out. But at least the nice bath makes up for it.

I would like to point out, as irrational as it is, I hate Yes-Bot. Hate hate hate. It's a creepy looking thing and it pisses me off with all it's built-in hero worship and if I figure out a way, I'm having it destroyed.

I liked the idea of Jack actually saving Omi, or at least having it seem like he saved the little guy. Not to say I'd ever write a GoodJack story, but having him at least be decent makes me happy.

I hope you guy's enjoyed this chapter just a little bit and I will try and update more often, though I make no promises. But my stories shall never die! That I can assure you.


	4. Jack has a Surprise Guest

First, a Disclaimer. **_Xiaolin Showdown _**is owned by Christy Hui and Warner Bros entertainment. I own nothing as of this moment, though don't hold me to that later.

**Vamp: **I'd like to start of with the following: I SUCK. Even though it's already written down, let it be known I Suck. It took a year. A Year. I couldn't convince myself to write for a freakin' year. I Suck.

I want to apologize to all the people who reviewed and favorited my story. I can't promise I'll get better, that's not fair to anyone, but I promise to try.

So, let's get this rigmarole going.

As you know, Jack is very OOC. And he will be for quite some time. I like to think jack is developing into someone new, someone untainted by 'Good' and 'Evil'. A Neutral, if you will. Makes me feel good about myself and about Jack. Also, blah blah blah, I'm OCD, blah blah blah, no beta-readers, call me out on stupid mistakes, hopefully I'll learn.

Oh, before I forget, **Akary55**:

_Gracias por el comentario. Me disculpo por mi español malo. Tuve que usar un traductor, el español no es uno de mis idiomas._

For those wondering why I put this up here instead of sending a message, I just wanted to show how jazzed I am about having a fan who speaks a different language than I do. Woot. I be jazzed.

Now, on with the story!

* * *

**Chapter 4:** Jack has a Surprise Guest

Jack wandered the halls of the mansion, shivering from the slight chill, as he searched for someone. Anyone. He had no idea how long he had been there; at the very least a few hours while he had been asleep; but so far he had only seen two robots.

He was absolutely alone.

He pulled his robe tighter around him. It was, like the bedspread, black and silky. And like the clothing he had wore, it had been rumpled and unloved, laying on the floor of the bathroom.

Whoever lived here -and Jack was still certain it couldn't have been him- didn't seem to care about anything at all, besides those goggles still on the nightstand.

This was more noticeable as Jack wandered the halls. It reminded him of a museum: very beautiful, very cold, and everything was fragile. So far, he had passed nine different cases filled with antiques, five vases, three paintings, and a tapestry that looked to be from some ancient Chinese dynasty he couldn't name. This had led him to the simple conclusion that he was in the home of the richest man alive.

Which made him very careful not to touch a goddamned thing.

He had this feeling of being watched as he moved along the halls. At any moment he expected to get-

He flinched. Slowly he opened his eyes, looking about. Damn. That always worked in movies. He rubbed the back of his neck, frowning as he looked about, trying to decide where to go.

He felt so much better since his bath. He hadn't gotten to wash his hair, which was mostly covered by his giant bandage, but the rest of him felt better. No more dirt and dried blood. He had noticed, though, as he had washed, that he was inordinarily pale. He wondered how pale he looked when his skin wasn't red from heat and cinnamon-scented soap.

He loved the smell. It felt so warm and comforting, unlike this mansion.

As his mind wandered to different ways he could complain about the place he was hiding out in, his thoughts were cut into by the sound of whirring machinery. A dark red eyebrow rose curiously as he moved down the small hallway towards the noise. He found a small wooden door that was partly open, the inner part lined with different locks from a chain to a deadbolt. Jack's hand twitched lightly.

This was obviously a very private place. He almost didn't want to head down there, if not for the feeling that was building in him.

He needed to see what was down there.

He moved slowly, careful not to make a sound even though the machinery would have drowned out any he could have made. He stretched his neck, peering around the corner to try to catch a glimpse of the room below. And what he saw took his breath away.

It was dark, light only by a handful of overhead lights. Everything was shades of black and grey, which looked more natural here than any other place in the bright house above. The walls were stone brick, the ground worn cement. Machinery, robotics, and tools covered almost every free space, save a large steel table in the center of the room. The far wall was one large computer screen, the desk beneath it a large keyboard. As Jack stepped forward, he found there was two doors in the room, one far to the left that seemed to lead outside, and another that was sealed off.

And everywhere there were robots. They filled the air to the point that a lesser man might have screamed. Yet Jack only felt awe.

He wandered more into the room, not even bothering to duck the flying or wheeling robots, knowing instantly that they would move for him.

He rested his hands on the steel table, splaying his fingers. Something in his panged.

He felt incomplete.

He let out a sigh, and turned search the room, when the sound of chuckling met his ears. He whipped around, meeting playful green eyes that flashed from the shadows. He heard what sounded like purring, and tensed. The sound made his shoulders lock painfully.

"Well, well. Did widdle Jackie get hurt at another showdown. Poor widdle Jackie." the voice teased, the eyes growing cold.

Jack swallowed, feeling more nervous than he had when he had first arrived.

"Who are you?"

* * *

**Vamp: **Didn't see that coming, hmm? Anyone guess who it is? Bet you have. Bet you were all hoping for Omi. Well, unless Omi grew three feet taller and turned into a bitch, I'm pretty sure that ain't Omi.

Hopefully the next chapter will make everything clearer and tider.

Before I leave, here's some food for thought, my dear fans: I want Jack to stumble onto a Shen Gong Wu, but doing the Monkey Staff seems too easy. Anyone have a suggestion? Think on it as I write Chapter 5!


End file.
